While I believe my daughter was vulnerable to what is happening based on some personality traits, and maybe something on our family dynamic also allowed for her to be vulnerable to all this too, I see what you are saying. We can and should - maybe must - rise to this challenge if we are to succeed as a species. And we must rise to this challenge because that will make life worthwhile. We can’t get weak, we can’t hide, we can’t give up, and we can’t give in. For some of us, that might mean speaking out, writing, speaking to friends and strangers who don’t understand what’s happening. For others, it means changing the way we parent, or even doubling down on how we parent for some. For all of us, it means learning how to accept the things we cannot change, etc. For you specifically, I think you have a calm about you that inspires confidence and I’m pretty sure you are a great coach. (I have heard you are.). You’re also a great writer and I find inspiration in your words. Keep doing what you do.
Yes, our daughters were vulnerable. How best to address this vulnerability for them and for future generations? This "why me" orientation I describe in this article implies telos; a perspective (a worldview really) that I've come to believe supports a healthy human experience. If we can make meaning and purpose of Life's most painful circumstances in this way, I think it helps us to "rise to the challenge" with hope and optimism. I suspect I may view the challenge a bit differently though. ;) "how we parent" is certainly a component and I'd expand that and say "how we human" in general. Parenting/family provides rich ground--the "workshop" as one of my clients puts it--to develop the wisdom and maturity that can offer more stability to the world.
"We can’t get weak, we can’t hide, we can’t give up, and we can’t give in." Amen, Sister!
Thank you so much for the kind words and encouragement!
"Yes, I’m talking about the Hero’s Journey and your call to purpose, to evolve into a more conscious, compassionate, curious, resilient, whole version of yourself because humanity needs this from you."
Some very good questions, some valuable and useful perspectives and insights. Though one might suggest that not all purposes are created equal -- having the biggest ball of string when one checks out is maybe not a particularly useful legacy to leave behind. 😉🙂
But reminds me of a couple of stories or vignettes from some books that have had a seminal influence on me, and on many others, i.e., Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, and The Ascent of Man.
Speaking to your "torture", Fear & Loathing segment on acid trips:
"The acid had shifted gears on him; the next phrase would probably be one of those hellishly intense introspection nightmares. Four hours or so of catatonic despair; but nothing physical, nothing dangerous." [pg. 62]
And Ascent:
"We are nature's unique experiment to make the rational intelligence prove itself sounder than the reflex. Knowledge is our destiny. Self-knowledge, at last bringing together the experience of the arts and the explanations of science, waits ahead of us. .... We are a scientific civilization: that means, a civilization in which knowledge and its integrity are crucial. ....
We are all afraid -- for our confidence, for the future, for the world. This is the nature of the human imagination. Yet every man[/woman], every civilization, has gone forward because of its engagement with what it has set itself to do. The personal commitment of a [person] to [their] skill, the intellectual commitment and the emotional commitment working together as one, has made the Ascent of Man." [pgs. 268, 269]
Thanks for the thoughtful comment. I found myself curious about what led you to this particular thought: "having the biggest ball of string when one checks out is maybe not a particularly useful legacy to leave behind". Was this implied in the article?
Thanks. Though that "ball of string" comment wasn't meant to cast any "aspersions" on your article or on your entirely commendable theme or thesis, i.e., "Because I have a role to play in humanity’s evolution."
It was just something of an oblique or sardonic reference to something I, and many others, have puzzled over -- from time immemorial. And after some 70-odd years, I'm not sure I'm any closer to an answer ... 🙂
But reminds me of a book an old girlfriend had once gifted me with, Rick Warren's "The Purpose Driven Life", subtitled "What On Earth Am I Here For?"
Good question. "The Greater Glory of Man and God"? A cynical rejoinder to which is something ostensibly from the French Revolution -- "Apres moi, le deluge" -- after me the flood. Why should I care what happens after I'm dead and buried?
Rather short-sighted that perspective -- arguably the reason for that revolution and subsequent Reign of Terror. So something of a choice between Scylla and Charybdis, the most sensible response being something from another revolution, ostensibly from Benjamin Franklin: we hang together or we hang alone. E Pluribus Unum and all that. 🙂
While I believe my daughter was vulnerable to what is happening based on some personality traits, and maybe something on our family dynamic also allowed for her to be vulnerable to all this too, I see what you are saying. We can and should - maybe must - rise to this challenge if we are to succeed as a species. And we must rise to this challenge because that will make life worthwhile. We can’t get weak, we can’t hide, we can’t give up, and we can’t give in. For some of us, that might mean speaking out, writing, speaking to friends and strangers who don’t understand what’s happening. For others, it means changing the way we parent, or even doubling down on how we parent for some. For all of us, it means learning how to accept the things we cannot change, etc. For you specifically, I think you have a calm about you that inspires confidence and I’m pretty sure you are a great coach. (I have heard you are.). You’re also a great writer and I find inspiration in your words. Keep doing what you do.
Yes, our daughters were vulnerable. How best to address this vulnerability for them and for future generations? This "why me" orientation I describe in this article implies telos; a perspective (a worldview really) that I've come to believe supports a healthy human experience. If we can make meaning and purpose of Life's most painful circumstances in this way, I think it helps us to "rise to the challenge" with hope and optimism. I suspect I may view the challenge a bit differently though. ;) "how we parent" is certainly a component and I'd expand that and say "how we human" in general. Parenting/family provides rich ground--the "workshop" as one of my clients puts it--to develop the wisdom and maturity that can offer more stability to the world.
"We can’t get weak, we can’t hide, we can’t give up, and we can’t give in." Amen, Sister!
Thank you so much for the kind words and encouragement!
Well said! You are modeling authenticity for us. 💖
Thank you!! I too am a coach and believe this is such a needed thing. Thanks for all that you do to support others. :)
🙏💜
"Yes, I’m talking about the Hero’s Journey and your call to purpose, to evolve into a more conscious, compassionate, curious, resilient, whole version of yourself because humanity needs this from you."
Some very good questions, some valuable and useful perspectives and insights. Though one might suggest that not all purposes are created equal -- having the biggest ball of string when one checks out is maybe not a particularly useful legacy to leave behind. 😉🙂
But reminds me of a couple of stories or vignettes from some books that have had a seminal influence on me, and on many others, i.e., Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, and The Ascent of Man.
Speaking to your "torture", Fear & Loathing segment on acid trips:
"The acid had shifted gears on him; the next phrase would probably be one of those hellishly intense introspection nightmares. Four hours or so of catatonic despair; but nothing physical, nothing dangerous." [pg. 62]
And Ascent:
"We are nature's unique experiment to make the rational intelligence prove itself sounder than the reflex. Knowledge is our destiny. Self-knowledge, at last bringing together the experience of the arts and the explanations of science, waits ahead of us. .... We are a scientific civilization: that means, a civilization in which knowledge and its integrity are crucial. ....
We are all afraid -- for our confidence, for the future, for the world. This is the nature of the human imagination. Yet every man[/woman], every civilization, has gone forward because of its engagement with what it has set itself to do. The personal commitment of a [person] to [their] skill, the intellectual commitment and the emotional commitment working together as one, has made the Ascent of Man." [pgs. 268, 269]
Thanks for the thoughtful comment. I found myself curious about what led you to this particular thought: "having the biggest ball of string when one checks out is maybe not a particularly useful legacy to leave behind". Was this implied in the article?
Thanks. Though that "ball of string" comment wasn't meant to cast any "aspersions" on your article or on your entirely commendable theme or thesis, i.e., "Because I have a role to play in humanity’s evolution."
It was just something of an oblique or sardonic reference to something I, and many others, have puzzled over -- from time immemorial. And after some 70-odd years, I'm not sure I'm any closer to an answer ... 🙂
But reminds me of a book an old girlfriend had once gifted me with, Rick Warren's "The Purpose Driven Life", subtitled "What On Earth Am I Here For?"
Good question. "The Greater Glory of Man and God"? A cynical rejoinder to which is something ostensibly from the French Revolution -- "Apres moi, le deluge" -- after me the flood. Why should I care what happens after I'm dead and buried?
Rather short-sighted that perspective -- arguably the reason for that revolution and subsequent Reign of Terror. So something of a choice between Scylla and Charybdis, the most sensible response being something from another revolution, ostensibly from Benjamin Franklin: we hang together or we hang alone. E Pluribus Unum and all that. 🙂