Painful Transitions
It may not be officially summer yet but I know many moms reading this find themselves on the other side of high school and college graduations that took great courage, that looked nothing like the vision they had of what it would be like to attend this rite of passage event for their child. Some tolerated chosen names and/or wrong-sex pronouns, feeling completely out-of-touch with and often jealous of the other parents in attendance, navigating hyper consciously and feeling like they were in a scene from The Stepford Wives. These monumental transitions in our children’s lives are not only painful reminders of how misaligned we feel with today’s culture, but they can also bring a frightening sense of urgency as it sinks in how little control we now have over our children’s outcomes. Here are a couple of articles that give a good sense of where I was this time last year as my daughter completed her education program the same month that she would turn 18:
F*#K of, Hitler! (My thoughts about Taika Waititi have shifted considerably over the past year but I still love his older content)
One year later, our family is facing another life-altering transition as our soon-to-be 19yo daughter prepares to leave the nest before the end of the month. She and her roommates were approved for a cute little house, and it looks like she’s also secured a job. Mostly, I’m proud of her and excited for her next adventure, but I’d be lying if I said my inner Mama Bear isn’t still worried about what steps she might take toward medicalization when she’s no longer under our roof, and residing in a different state.
Sooo, if you’ve not already discovered it, my interview with Benjamin Boyce was published recently. I have to confess, coming off the conversation, I was pretty nervous about how it went. I’ve listened twice and had a very different experience each time. I knew that it would end up nothing like what I’d rehearsed in my mind as I imagined how it might go. I was very right about that! For reasons I won’t go into, I was pretty tired and out-of-sorts when we recorded and admittedly expecting the worst when I listened the first time. Funny how we find what we’re looking for. I relistened after I’d had a couple people insist that I’d fielded his unexpected prompts with calm and grace, and maybe even some unique insight. It was an interesting conversation to be sure and I’ve embedded it below so you can make up your own mind about it.
As always after these conversations that are going to be published for a wide audience, there are certain questions I’d love another shot at—I’d respond with absolute brilliance now that I’ve had time to ruminate on them! ;) But, of course, interviews don’t work this way. I know many of the guests I’ve had on conversations along the way have had this same experience. I can attest to the vulnerability it takes and I always appreciate when guests accept my invitation and are willing to put themselves out there. I’m also grateful to Benjamin Boyce for having me on and for our “playful” conversation.
Inside The SMP Community Center
This month’s theme inside the Center is forgiveness and it’s related concepts such as blame, compassion, control, and freedom. I think it can be a misunderstood concept and I find myself really interested in the idea of forgiveness as a mechanism of healing. Yet, I don’t know that I could explain what it looks like or how to do it. I don’t know that I thought much about it once I forgave myself–mostly for what I didn’t know as I was raising my kids in this upside down world we currently inhabit.
I look forward to our live conversation on the topic of forgiveness coming up later this week! If you think you might be interested in checking out the related resources housed in the Community Center or joining this amazing group of moms who meet monthly to discuss growth-oriented topics, you can learn more by following The SMP Community Center tab on this Substack’s home page and scrolling down below the image.
I've read and commented on the other post before reading this one. The only thing I can say is I am now even more impressed with your grace in answering these comments <3
🤷♂️ We choose our path. If you’re giving interviews on this topic that can be widely seen, I would simply hope that there would be some attachment to known facts surrounding the topic. I just didn’t hear ANY of that in your interview.